“Let’s talk later”: Why later? Why not now? Am I being fired? Are you going to tell me you hate me? WHATEVER IT IS, NOW IS THE TIME TO TELL ME. There is no time like the present.
“You should really to calm down”: Oh, you are so right! Let me just go do that. Do you think I haven’t been trying that my whole life? It’s not that easy. It’s like me telling you to grow an extra arm over night. Impossible.
“I am sure it’s nothing, but your blood test results were a bit elevated”: Nothing good can come of hearing this. Ever. Are you really sure it’s nothing or are you just saying this for me to calm down? AM I DYING?!
“Give me a call later”: Wait, you want me to call you? Why? Does the text messaging function in your phone not work? The only person I talk to on the phone is my grandmother. Are you my grandmother in a different body? Did some sort of Freaky Friday scenario occur? No? Well then, I am not calling you. I literally prefer to be smacked in the head.
“I’ll call you later”: Do you not know how to text? CALLS STRESS ME OUT. Do you want to give me a heart attack? Seriously, if you want me to drop dead, just call me. That will get the job done.
“You are overreacting. This is nothing to be stressed about”. OVERREACTING? I have an anxiety disorder. That means that overreacting is the norm for me. And how do you know that I am overreacting? Can you tell me 100% for sure that I won’t develop cancer tomorrow?
“You need to worry less”: Oh, of course I do. Hang on, let me go do that. WAIT. I can’t. It’s impossible for me. It’s like telling a cat to not chase a mouse. My brain is wired to worry. I DON’T KNOW HOW NOT TO WORRY.
What else do you hate hearing? Please chime in below!